Sunday, July 6, 2008

That's How We Roll!

Things I learned from my "skate date" at Skateland:

1. You can tell the hard core skaters or "regulars" based on their skates: pimped out skates with custom chrome rims
The regulars also tend to be tall, skinny white guys with slicked back greasy hair who wear silk shirts that are buttoned half way up. Sex-ay!

Someone really needs to tell the 30-year-old guys that there are better places to go on a Saturday night to pick up chicks...

4. Rollerbladers are NOT cool and consequently shunned.
5. Watch out for skate gangs. Seriously, they'll bust a cap on you.
Dancing ability on the dance floor directly translates to skate floor: black people still can work it and dance and white people still...can't.

White guys dancing on skates is probably about the whitest thing ever.

If your not thug or cool enough to be in a real gang, apparently skating around the rink at Skateland is the next best thing. Wifebeaters and Jnco jeans are mandatory.
9. The middle of rink is reserved for the hard core skaters who want to practice/show off their sweet dance moves--all of which were pitifully embarrassing. These guys have nothing on BreakSk8.
The patrons of Skateland are 10x more ghetto than those in Provo. This makes the experience 100x more AWESOME.

Favorite quote of the night:
  • "Tomorrow is single's hip hop night. NO KIDS! You should come." --Creepy silk shirt guy


Chelsea said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chelsea said...

It's time for another Good Idea/Bad Idea.

Good Idea: Skating in circles around the rink.

Bad Idea: Skating circles around the "regulars"

(Wanna Be Skate Gang gets jealous of your sweet dance moves and gives you the oust.)

The End

{alex cichon} said...

So I'm guessing this is what you did on your date? Sounds like fun ;)! We totally need to do a gno soon! Oh and you know you are always invited to the Harbertson Parties! :)

flaviano said...

thanks for watching my interview, lady!

Bri and Adam said...

Yeah, but you can't forget, you're not really cool until you get kicked out of a skate rink by a Bishop while wearing polyester and your fiance in an afro wig! haha.

The Harbertson's said...

Hi Morgan,
Just wanted to say "Hi" love those tight silky sweaty shirts, I remember them from the 70's

Melissa said...

hahahahaha you crack me up!! I haven't been to skateland in years! Sounds like fun :)